If asked which is the most important sense, many of us would choose sight, but hearing is one of our first and most vital senses.

Sound is an important way to connect with the world around us. In evolutionary terms, hearing was vital for our hunter-gatherer ancestors to hunt and find prey, and nowadays it is an important tool for communicating with others.

Babies are born with fully developed hearing – unlike their sight, which takes a while to develop – and we’ve all heard stories about mums playing pre-birth classical music or dads talking to bloated tummies.

Listening is one of the most valuable human skills and it is a gift that we can easily give to another human being.

What are the different listening styles?

We all know people who don’t really listen to us. You know the ones who just wait until you finish what you’re saying – or sometimes don’t even do that – so they can speak up and have their say. It turns out that there can be as many as seven different listening styles, and they’re all useful in different scenarios.

The way we listen changes in different situations and depending on who/what we are listening to and why we are listening.

  • Active hearing

Active listening is perhaps the most familiar form of listening, but also the one we all strive to achieve. Active listening is when we are fully engaged in listening to what someone is saying. We also look at him carefully, observing his body language and facial expressions.

It is sometimes referred to as sensory listening because we need to engage all of our senses. Active listening includes verbal and non-verbal cues, such as nodding or perhaps adding words of encouragement.

Active listening takes you beyond words. It is a dynamic experience. It is listening that will lead you to give meaningful answers or advice to your interlocutor.

  • Informational or critical listening

This type of listening can be something we do instinctively in a work environment (a meeting or an interview, for example). “Critical listening is where you evaluate, analyze and question what you hear. It’s a useful form of problem solving, delegating tasks, or getting things done.

It can also be used to elicit more information from the speaker and assess things like suitability for a job, for example.

  • Biased listening

Are there people who annoy you, no matter what they say? Biased listening is when we hear what we want to hear, based on our judgments, values, filters, or sphere of knowledge. We are also likely to reject any information that is contrary to what we currently believe.

  • Defense hearing

Defensive listening is where we actually close our ears and don’t listen at all. You’re actually just waiting to speak your mind, regardless of what the other person has told you. This kind of listening is often preceded by the words “yes, but.” Neurologically, the ‘but’ tends to invalidate what has been said in the first place.”

  • Distracted listening

You listen while doing something else (we’ve all done it). Maybe we are engaged in some other activity or simply not interested in what we are hearing. In this case, we will not hear everything that is said and we may miss the meaning or even important information. For the person speaking, this can make them feel undervalued or misunderstood.

  • Empathic listening

The exact opposite of distracted listening, empathic listening is often used when talking with friends or loved ones. We may listen more empathetically to friends when they tell us their concerns. In this way, we can access the emotions being expressed and respond in a way that allows others to understand that we understand or want to share their problem. This type of listening can also be used in types of therapy where it helps create a sense of safety.