Mariska Hargitay she says the process of going public with her story contributed to her healing process. The actress earlier this month penned a first-person editorial for the cover of US magazine People, revealing for the first time that she was a rape victim in her 30s.

Speaking on the Today show, Hargitay explained that she was relieved to share what happened to her with the world. “I think it’s a matter of physics, right?” he said. “If we carry a burden alone, it is too heavy. But if it is sand and we all hold a grain and carry it for each other, it is not so heavy. So for me, admitting it was very powerful and I feel lighter. And the time has come for me not to carry it anymore.”

In her article, the actress did not name the perpetrator, but she said the man who raped her was someone she considered a friend.

“It wasn’t sexual at all. It was dominance and control. Too much control. I tried every way I knew how to get out of it. I tried to make jokes, to be charming, to set boundaries, to reason with him, to say no. He grabbed my arms and held me down. I was terrified. I didn’t want it to escalate into violence. Now I know he was already sexually violent, but I was afraid he would become physically violent. I froze…I went out of my body” He wrote.