When you start a new relationship, it is normal to feel excited to feel butterflies in the stomach, receive tender messages and enjoying each other’s attention. But what happens when this attention becomes excessive? When, instead of tender feelings and moments of joy, do you feel and drown out by some excessive events of worship?

This can be love bombing, a tactic where someone “bombers” you with love, gifts and promises, not because it truly loves you, but to control and manipulate you.

What is love bombing?

Love bombing is a technique that is usually used by toxic or narcissistic individuals in relationships. In the beginning, they make you feel that you are the most special person in the world. They tell you that you are their sister’s soul, they are constantly sending you messages, they give you gifts, and they promise that this relationship is “different” of all others.
But this excessive love is not honest. It is a form of control. Once they feel that they have “won” you, they may start to become distant, demanding or even manipulative.

Love bombing or true love?

How can you stand out if someone really loves you or if you bomb you with love for the wrong reasons?

The pace of the relationship: If everything moves too fast, it can be a bad sign. If someone tells you “I love you” in a few days or is pushing you to commit immediately, it may be trying to trap you emotionally.

Creepy Perfect Romanticism: It is natural to enjoy surprises and romantic movements, but if one overdoes it – with luxurious gifts, excessive words of worship and constant pressure to be together – he may try to manipulate you.

Jealousy and control: After the phase of intense love, possessiveness may occur. If it makes you jealousy scenes, if you are bothered to talk to friends or family, or if it tries to control where you are and what you do, it is a sign that the relationship becomes toxic.

Abrupt changes in behavior: At first it can be perfect, but suddenly change. To begin to become indifferent, cold or even critical. This is because love bombing cannot last forever – it is a strategy to make you bond, not true love.

How to protect against love bombing

If you feel that someone is bombarding you with love, think of the following:

Take your time – don’t let anyone push you to move on to something if you don’t feel ready. True love is gradually built.
Stay loyal to yourself – if you feel that you are changing your behavior to thank someone, stop and evaluate if this relationship is healthy.
Don’t ignore the signs – if something seems to you “too good to be true”, listen to your instinct.
Talk to friends and family – if you feel that you are isolated or that someone is pushing you to move away from your loved ones, it is a cause for concern.

True love doesn’t push you, it’s a little too effortless

Romance is beautiful, but love should not make you feel trapped or obliged. True love respects your space and time, you do not need exaggeration and, most importantly, makes you feel safe and serene. If something makes you feel pressure, jealousy or anxiety, it may be time to wonder if it is true love or love bombing.