Psychotherapy has been taboo for decades, still causing embarrassment to those who consider trying it.
Psychotherapy it was taboo for decades upon decades, still causing embarrassment to those who consider trying it.
The decision to start psychotherapy is a difficult one, especially for men. While women were quicker to get into the process of knowing themselves and delving into their feelings, men still seem to struggle with the idea.
The role of stereotypes
“Normative gender roles teach men that human emotions, such as sadness, frustration, fear, jealousy, are shameful and should not be expressed or experienced. This results in everything being expressed through anger, forcing men to not allow themselves to create space for emotionality,” therapist Paul Silverman tells bustle.com.
And while many men live with the idea that they must always appear strong, research reveals that in reality people are more attracted to men who express their most vulnerable side and embrace the idea of exploring their emotions through psychotherapy.
What do men who dare psychotherapy gain?
One of the advantages that a man can get from psychotherapy is that he develops the ability to open up, creating the ground for the other to do the same, as a result of which the desired intimacy is achieved more quickly and effectively. “When people are vulnerable with us, we feel much more comfortable being vulnerable with them,” says psychotherapist Whitney Goodman. “It’s also a great sign when someone is investing in their mental health and their future.”
According to a study by Hinge, 61% of people who participate in the app rank emotional vulnerability as a must when it comes to finding new partners. Similarly, 65% said it’s attractive when someone talks about their feelings on a first date, 84% think it’s a “green flag” when people open up, and 63% think about the prospect of a relationship with someone who talks about his hopes and fears from the first date.
A man who deals with his emotions in this way also cultivates the ability to resolve any conflicts more effectively, better understanding the other person’s positions and creating a better perspective on the future of the relationship.
“At the end of the day, we all just want to be heard and understood. I think it’s really hard for someone to do that for others if they haven’t worked on themselves and hold onto the idea that they’re tough, strong, resilient and never feel anything,” says reader Joanna.
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