Do you really want a salad for lunch or do you just eat it because you have to?

Many times you may have gotten into the process of wondering if what you do or what you have learned to like is really “you”.

And while there is sometimes a very clear and unambiguous answer to the question “for whom am I doing this?”, Other times things are a little more vague. Especially if you have learned to be the one who sets a good example or the one who always wants to satisfy everyone.

What does it mean to eat “effectively”?
Loving and caring for your body is important. Always feeding it with the best ingredients to support its functions is also a prerequisite for your psychosomatic well-being. And certainly many of the foods that play in the A ‘national health, happen to be very tasty. Clearly, then, you can enjoy a diet that may be considered by many to be overly healthy. Let us not forget, after all, that people’s tastes and needs vary.

In other words, you can be the fit of the company, the one who will prefer to go to the gym instead of drinking or who will wake up early after a night out to go to the gym, without this meaning that you are oppressing yourself. You can eat a salad for lunch instead of a burger and still feel like the most complete person in the world. Oh yes, and it happens.

But what happens when the image you have projected ends up making you feel obligated to do only what you think is expected of you? And if once you want not to set a good example and just try something else, how much space is there for something like that?

Everyone is used to you, after all, with the greenery in the lunch box and the bunch of tea in hand, and they will certainly not be so discreet if you suddenly pop your nose with the buger from the take away.

The above is just one possible scenario. Note that this condition does not have to be related to your current physical condition. You may have mentioned that you want to be healthier, lose some weight or that you are just trying to make “better” decisions for your life than eating a hamburger. Whatever the reason, this concept is called performative eating and is a version of people-pleasing. The concept of performative eating, in other words, to eat effectively, describes in other words your need to eat what others expect of you.

Nutrition and social implications
Eating is a very social habit and it is common for social pressures to affect food intake. According to nutritionist Kimberley Neve * “women in particular tend to be very aware of how others perceive them and the combination of appearance and identity is a thought that takes up a lot of space in their head.”

At the same time, we live in an age where almost everyone has social media and almost everyone can identify as food influencers, wellness coaches or anything similar. Social is full of celebrities (if they are all celebrities) who share nutrition tips, recipes, and what they eat during the day, sometimes fighting the so-called clean eaters, all in the name of the so-called intuitive diet. (Note that I have my doubts about whether we understand exactly what this concept means).

After all, do you eat effectively?
According to Kimberley Neve, “a good way to identify it is to observe what you eat depending on where you are and, most importantly, depending on your roommates. In case you would choose something different if you ate alone, then this may be a sign that you are trying to prove something or adapt somewhere without your genuine desire. Feeling stressed and criticized when you eat can also be a sign that you are a little too worried about what others will think about your eating choices.

What can you do to get rid of the title of performative eater?
To overcome this pattern, there is only one thing you can do and that is to address your insecurities. As Neve points out, we often feel pressured to eat a certain way because we have low self-esteem or because we are worried that we will feel inferior to someone else if we just eat as we please. As always, the issue is not food. Food is just something we can control. So start by redefining your relationship with your body, your overall image, your surroundings and the expectations that exist (or that you think exist) of you.

If everything is in your mind, then try to find a way to improve your attitude towards things. If, on the other hand, you are really receiving negative influences from your circle, then maybe you should stay only where you can really exist as yourself and you will not feel that you owe explanations. In any case, eating effectively is not (just) about food.

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