The lack of love life between couples can have many causes. The endless running obligations, the loss of passion, some health problem and various others. Many times, everyday life leads people astray and it may take some time before they realize the problem. When they finally realize they’ve drifted apart, they may feel like it’s too late to save their love life.

And yet, this is not true, point out the therapists, who reveal that one is the main reason why couples stop having sex, while also giving advice on how to deal with the problem. By preventing the main cause that “holds back” sex life, you can ensure intense love experiences with your partner for many years.

In many cases, a disconnection in the bedroom is indicative of a more general disconnection within the relationship.

“It’s not because of a lack of physical desire, or that a person no longer finds their partner attractive, or even that they are driven by the desire to have sex with another person,” psychologist David Tzall tells bestlifeonline.com. “All of these can certainly happen, but the root cause is that you no longer feel safe, comfortable or connected to your partner.”

If there is emotional insecurity in the couple, it stands to reason that there cannot be a satisfying sex life.

Emotional distance builds over time

An emotional disconnect doesn’t suddenly appear out of nowhere. If you observe the development of your relationship, you can distinguish it before it escalates and develops into a big problem. According to Tzall, emotional distance often occurs in couples who don’t communicate well.

“The wounds that are created develop into resentment,” he explains. “The couple talks less and less and doesn’t share their needs or wants, emotionally, mentally and physically.”

Sometimes even the people involved in the relationship themselves fail to identify the problem. “They usually ignore the causes and end up blaming either themselves or the other person for the problem. If you blame your partner, you may create a rift, risking a breakup. This climate only increases the distance between the couple.”

With communication problems emerging, even if the couple has a sex life, it is likely not to be as fulfilling as it used to be.

Other responsibilities can exacerbate emotional distance

While lack of communication can cause rifts that lead to emotional distance, other factors also contribute.

“Most of the couples I’ve encountered who complain about not having sex as often or at all seem to be preoccupied with other obligations, such as parenting, careers, and illness, both mental and physical,” says Natalie Jimenez, therapist marriage and family. “Distraction, which can start gradually, becomes more pervasive if not treated early and leads to emotional and physical disconnection, making intercourse more difficult.”

This is especially true for women, who tend to need an emotional connection to be sexual, Jimenez explains.

Clear communication can bridge the gap

This sexual distance does not mean it will last forever.

“The best advice would be for the couple to talk openly about it,” says Tzall. “Some may see this as exacerbating the issue, but only by bringing it to light can it be looked at and dealt with properly.”

If discussing the topic makes you nervous, seek the help of a couples counselor. “The couple will learn how to listen and talk to each other in an intentional way, without reacting or taking comments or behaviors personally,” says Tzall. “When communication is poor between a couple, it’s usually not a lack of quantity, but quality. This means that both partners are essentially not listening to each other’s wants and needs.”