When Benny Blanco announced his engagement with Selena Gomez at the Golden Globes this year, Nikki Glaser, the presenter, said a gin had made a wish. Those who did not know Benny or his relationship with Selena assumed that this statement was true, I definitely believed it.

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Whatever he was, he seemed extremely lucky. But after I started learning more about Benny, I realized that we may have judged a little prematurely. The more I watch him, the more I wonder how Selena found such a thoughtful, tender and emotionally smart man. Honestly, I thought such men had almost disappeared, so on my side, Selena really had the best wish.

Ever since they released their album, I SAID I Love You First, last week, the couple has given many interviews. But what impresses the world most is not the album (though it’s great), it’s Benny Blanco. A clip from their interview with Jay Shetty’s Podcast, on Purpose, have been released everywhere, and the internet has unanimously decided to be “Green Flag”. Since Selena said she felt “immediate security” with him until Benny said that men who were not listening were “stupid”, we totally agree.

Benny knows exactly what he wants in his life

In an interview entitled “How Benny taught me to re -enter”, Benny reveals that he had made a list of the features he wanted in his future partner (and even with his therapist !!) before he even met Selena. His level of self -awareness and his true desire to be in a relationship that is the “perfect yin and yang”, as he describes it, is something that unfortunately is not discussed as much as he should. In our time, where appointments are chaotic and ghosting has become normal, it is so relief to know that there are still people who want a true and meaningful relationship. This is, after all, the basis to build a real “unit”, as Selena says. And Benny really wanted it.

It is not enough to say “I know its strengths and weaknesses”, this is good, but Benny did more. She learned to support Selena on all aspects of her life, and even with prevention. For example, she says: “I know what she needs … she wants to talk to me before she sleeps, she wants to say ‘I love you’, she wants to send her a message if I delay somewhere for two hours.” We feel you, Selena! And it says how easy and fast it is to send a message, but how much it really “helps”, especially when you are in a distance.

The importance of listening to the relationship

In the most beloved part of the interview for everyone, Benny is shaking men who do not hear (finally !!). “A woman will tell you exactly what she needs,” she explains. When you think about it, it is not so difficult to support your partner, as long as you hear it and care. Let’s make it clear: Listening, as a man, is not something worthy of congratulations is just something you have to do for the people you love.

Even the most conscious and tender people have conflicts, and the couple are not afraid to admit that they are not perfect. As Benny says: “We are the farthest of the perfect that can be.” But immediately afterwards adds: “We are perfect for each other.” Benny explains that he always wants to “fix things” for Selena, but understands that strong women “carry the world on their backs.” He goes on to say sometimes “they just want to complain about something, and that’s ok … all you need is to hear.” Finally, a man who understands that being a woman is difficult and tiring, and that we do not always have to “be saved”. It is clear that Selena can rely on Benny, whatever happens.

The truth is that Benny has broken some standards

And all this to say: I can’t believe that Benny’s toes were out throughout the interview, and no one said anything about it on the internet. Considering how hard the internet is, it shows that what someone is saying, who really is and how it treats others is much more important than it looks or where it comes from.

If you ask me, Benny has inspired women everywhere to look for a man who is truly kind, who never makes them doubt about how respectful and dear they are. And if this is not the most perfect example of “Green Flag”, then I really don’t know what it is.