If you feel that the idea of ​​sex doesn’t seem particularly enticing to you, or you feel that you’d rather spend your energy doing some work around the house than in bed with your partner, then your libido is probably not going through its best phase.

Don’t worry, though, this is a fairly common occurrence. According to a 2013 study, up to 43% of women experience low libido at least once in their lives. That, however, doesn’t mean you have to live with it. There are things that will help you regain your lost love.

1. The role of nutrition

You’ve surely heard about aphrodisiac foods, that is, those that “awaken” the erotic mood. “Basil, bananas, figs, avocados and garlic contain certain vitamins and minerals that increase blood flow to the genitals, boosting libido,” said Dainis Graveris, relationship expert at Sexual Alpha.

According to him, chocolate releases serotonin and other chemicals that increase libido. Graveris argues that an overall healthy diet promotes heart health and good blood circulation, which can also support amorous mood. So there’s nothing wrong with enjoying the aphrodisiac properties of “guilty” foods, but you should know that a nutritious diet will keep your libido healthy.

2. Try kegel exercises

The fact that the vagina is an internal organ does not mean that it does not need training. Strengthening the pelvic floor not only improves the health of the genitals, but also the sex life. “Women can benefit from doing Kegels regularly to strengthen pelvic muscles and regain lost libido,” says gynecologist Alexandra Bausic.

To do a Kegel exercise, squeeze your pelvic muscles for 5 seconds and then relax. Repeat the same movement a few times and practice daily. Dr. Bausic also suggests trying kegel balls, which strengthen the area, giving more sexual pleasure.

3. Get to know yourself better

And as much as today’s era has allowed, to some extent, progress, the exploration of sexuality, especially for women, is still a strong taboo. That’s why many end up not knowing themselves what exactly they want and what makes them feel good. “A lot of people don’t know what turns them on,” says sexologist Marla Renee Stewart. “When you know what you like, you can claim it. At the same time, you don’t spend time and energy on things that don’t satisfy you.” Don’t hesitate to explore your body.

4. Manage your stress levels

I know, it sounds easy, but it’s not. Stress is all around us and it often plagues us. In addition to all the other health problems it can cause – and there are many – it can also negatively affect your sex life. “The less you worry about, the more you can devote yourself to enjoying sex, allowing yourself to feel the arousal. “Find out what’s stressing you out and deal with it. Sure, you can’t eliminate stress, but you can reduce it to the minimum possible degree.” Graveris suggests trying meditation, yoga, and other relaxation techniques, as well as spending time doing activities that make you happy. At the same time, make sure you get 7-9 hours of quality sleep every day.

5. Don’t ignore the pain, face it

The romantic mood is directly linked to mental health. However, often women face a reduced libido due to some pain or discomfort in the pelvic area, which they even underestimate, as a result of which it is not treated. “It can be due to conditions such as endometriosis, vaginitis, vulvodynia, clitorodynia and others, which cause chronic pain or painful intercourse. Low back or hip pain could also affect sex drive. Such discomfort inhibits pleasure in sex,” says pelvic floor physiotherapist Heather Jeffcoat. “If you don’t deal with the pain, you won’t be able to enjoy sex,” he adds.

6. Focus on being generally healthy

Sex is an integral part of the health and well-being of the body. A healthy libido is an indication of a healthy body, so by taking care of your health in general, you will also ensure more sexual mood. “Exercise and body care in general increase stamina, improve body image and elevate mood, ultimately boosting libido,” explains sexologist Rachel Sommer.

Steward adds that healthy habits in general, even if they seem unrelated, can contribute to a healthier sex life. “Adopt habits that make you feel good about yourself. Meditation, hydration, exercise, sunlight and daily learning are some such activities.” By building a better relationship with yourself, you’ll generally be in a better mood,” she says.

7. Work on intimacy with your partner outside the bedroom as well

If you’re in a relationship and your libido is low, the problem may lie outside the bedroom. “Talk openly about your problems so you can prevent problems and resentment from building up. This will bring back the lost mood for sex,” advises Graveris. Emotional intimacy is directly related to physical intimacy, so it’s important to feel good with your partner. Prioritize quality time, practice open communication and make an effort to rekindle the spark between you.

8. Prioritize self-care

Self-care is vital to well-being and libido. “The psychological factor is decisive: Women need to be in balance with their needs and thoughts in order to have sexual drive,” argues Bausic. “Use whatever relaxes you and lifts your mood.” Like everything, sex drive needs recharging. So spend time on practices that connect the mind with the body and stimulate the senses.

9. Try something new

Routine is a misunderstood thing. In some cases it is a very good thing. This does not necessarily apply to sex life, however. Excitement and spontaneity are key parts of sexuality. So put some creativity into sex to keep the interest alive, keeping your amorous mood alive. This does not necessarily equate to extreme experimentation. Small changes are enough to renew your sex life.

“One of the best ways to improve your libido is to try something new,” says marriage counselor Diana Wiley. “Innovation in bed can do wonders.” “Try what you find interesting and feel like you could enjoy,” adds Sommer.

10. Consult your doctor

Improving sex drive is always a popular topic on the agenda. Low sex drive can be a sign that something is going on in the body. “Don’t hesitate to consult your doctor, especially if you’ve tried everything to boost your libido and nothing is working,” Graveris said. Everything from medications and medical conditions to hormonal changes can affect libido, so a chat with your doctor could be very enlightening.

Romance is an integral part of a healthy and balanced life and should not be underestimated. Look for the causes of your lost libido and solve them, so you can enjoy sex.