Life is not easy for tourist politicians who decided to run for São Paulo in the October elections.
The most recent setback came to Tarcísio de Freitas (Republicans), Bolsonaro’s bet for the state government. More carioca than a Globo cookie with iced mate, Tarcísio admitted that he does not live in the São José dos Campos property that he registered as his domicile.
Well, what a surprise. In a little while, Tarciso may appear eating farofa de içá, made with the ass of a saúva ant, to show off his ties to the Vale do Paraíba in São Paulo.
Before him, the former judge and ex-pica of the galaxies Sergio Moro had to take the road to the countryside, quite literally, and give up his plans to be elected by São Paulo.
Sergio and his wife Rosangela sought to stage the life of a couple from São Paulo. She took great care in an Instagram post with a photo carousel at Mercadão. The pair from Paraná was betrayed, you see, by the bologna sandwich.
The action that overthrew Moro’s candidacy, filed by deputy Alexandre Padilha (PT-SP), used the mortadella from the market as evidence that the Moros were just tourists in São Paulo. It’s very correct.
Anyone who lives in São Paulo knows that Mercadão’s bologna monster is not worth our hard-earned money. The sandwich is intended for visitors who are dazzled by the sleight of hand of the vendors who push them overpriced fruits and similar delicacies.
Another who tries to get along in this land is Mário “Ratanabá” Frias, from Rio de Janeiro like a car parked on the sidewalk.
Will Mario also attack the bologna? Or does the bologna, for Mário, symbolize the communist threat?
Will Mario take selfies on the cable-stayed bridge and Batman’s alley? Will he claim a dish named after him at Paris 6 on Haddock Lobo street?
Will Mário have a beer and eat some fried foods with artistic couvert at Bar Brahma? Will he look excitedly at the sign on the corner of Ipiranga and São João avenues, in the heart of Sampa?
No, because Sampa does not exist in SP. With all due respect to Caetano, Sampa only exists in the minds of outsiders. Sampa said, we know he doesn’t live here.
Former minister Tarcísio will allege xenophobia if they try to smear his candidacy from São Paulo. Bullshit.
São Paulo elected Lula from Pernambuco, Erundina from Paraíba, Tiririca from Ceará, Jânio Quadros from Mato Grosso, FHC, Celso Pitta and Alexandre Frota from Rio. All, in contrast to Tarcísio, Moro and Frias, who live in São Paulo.
Politicians from other states come to São Paulo because we have the largest population and the largest bench in the Chamber of Deputies. A winning candidate drags a morning glory of co-religionists to Brasília.
They count on our stupidity, and we have not let them down – see the election by São Paulo of Dudu “03” Bolsonaro, more carioca than the militias of Rio das Pedras.
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