How Parents Can Protect Their Children From Violence: Useful Tips and Guidelines

Bullying, aggression and verbal and physical violence inside and outside schools. Children are often called upon to experience difficult situations in their environment. For their part, parents in recent years have at their disposal tips, guidelines and useful practices to shield their children from the phenomenon of violence. And there may not be magic solutions, according to experts, but there are certainly many possibilities for parents, in collaboration with psychologists and teachers, to support their children in order to effectively deal with such incidents that may arise in school life.

“In the meetings we have with the parents, we find out their concerns about the phenomenon of violence and about the incidents that are reflected in the news. In this context, it is important for parents to be informed, to be sensitized and to attend seminars that will help them manage adolescents’ tensions and communicate better with their children “, Dr. points out in – . Of Psychology of the Aristotle University of Thessaloniki, Apostolos Kaliabos, who presents specific recommendations to parents.

Children must speak out to defend their rights

He first states that parents, but also teachers, can help children understand that they have rights and have to defend themselves. “Essentially, there needs to be a review of children’s perceptions. Parents can reconstruct the way their children think, explaining that speaking when threatened is neither an act of courage nor a nailing, but an act of defending personal rights. “It is an inalienable right of everyone to be calm, to have mental balance and not to feel that their rights are being violated,” he added.

How children can say “no”

Another useful recommendation for parents is to teach children that “no” is not bad, it is just an alternative to “yes” and a normal answer in case a child does not want to do something he does not like or does not like. Express. However, when the pressures increase and are repeated, the recommendation changes and no longer provides only for a child to say “no”, but to shift his interest to groups that do not create tension but make him feel good.

More specifically, it is important for a boy or a girl to defend his or her rights verbally and to warn the other party that the behavior that displeases him or her is not tolerable. “It’s important that a child responds. Ignoring such behavior essentially sends the message to the other side to continue to harass. Instead the answer, verbally, puts the other side in its place and disarms it and there are specific ways to do this. A student may respond with humor or show that he or she does not care, or turn the behavior around. For example, he may say ‘I do not care what you say, go on if you want, you are wasting your time, I do not care at all what you say’ “notes Mr. Kaliabos.

In the event that the behavior continues and the situation escalates, he advises parents to educate their children to warn the annoying side. In particular, children can resolutely inform that if this behavior does not stop, they will take whatever action is available to defend their rights and that from now on any responsibility will fall only on the one who is bothering them.

How a more introverted child is empowered

Another recommendation is for those children who are more introverted or feel that they do not fit in with their surroundings, either because they are boys and do not like football as usual, or because they do not have the same interests as the average person. their. Mr. Kaliabos emphasizes that “we see this many times with both boys and girls in adolescence. That is why it is important for every child, every teenager to recognize and reinforce their positive points, to find a field of interest, a creative activity, a way out of pleasant activity and here the role of parents is very big and important. “So they can stimulate children to find things that make them feel important, that help them feel that they belong somewhere, that give meaning to life, that create happy and resilient people, with confidence.”

Discussion and communication

On a more general level, the ability of parents and children to talk to each other is considered crucial for highlighting the values ​​of a society and developing critical thinking in children.

“Unbridled competition, obsession with matter and material goods makes the child often feel that if he is not successful. But children should not feel failed if they do not achieve some socially set goals. “The real values ​​that should be emphasized by parents are friendship, cooperation, engaging in things that give meaning to human life and one of these paths is creativity,” adds Dr. Of Psychology at AUTh.
In the same vein, he advises parents not to hesitate to seek help from a specialist who certainly knows some things better and can discuss with family members how to resist pressure, not to pay attention to small things, to solve conflicts. “No one is born with all the supplies to become a parent. No one is pre-trained for parenting. “This role certainly has many difficulties, but parents can be trained in strategies to help their children. After all, consulting experts does not make them inadequate in any case,” he added.

How to detect early signs

Finally, regarding the identification of some risk factors or some early signs of violence, Mr. Kaliabos emphasizes that parents should be activated if they find any unreasonable discomfort in their children, low self-esteem, early exposure. in violence, signs of cruelty and intense individualism, lack of empathy and lack of ability to manage personal problems. “Then you need a discussion with the children, advice from a specialist, cooperation with teachers,” he emphasizes characteristically.

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