Timing fights back, it’s a fact. The main use of I remember, in school or student years, was as an excuse to avoid entering into first platonic, then romantic relationships. When most of us didn’t step on our feet like elephants but more like cheetahs. You see, we lacked one courage, not to mention two.

To slip away from the truth of “I don’t like you”, or not to admit “I’m elsewhere, even if my other doesn’t know it”. To avoid any real personal reason why our answer was no. Whatever the reason behind our no, “sorry, not good timing” seemed like the most painless approach at the time.

The timing is here and there is no more excuse

You look back and wonder: why didn’t you just have the courage to call it quits? Looks like you knew the what, but not the how. What you want, what you don’t want, what you might want. But it was difficult how to achieve it, how to get it, even more difficult how to keep it. Not only then, but now it is so.

Let’s put Michael Brues, clinical psychologist and member of the American Academy of Sleep Medicine at this point in our conversation. Because in order to get our discussion on the right footing, it doesn’t seem to be enough to focus on the what and the how, if they don’t go hand in hand with the when.

Breus studied and talks to us about the power of when. When, as the right time when something will happen. Considering it as the basic foundation of success, since when is the key that brings out the fastest, smartest, best and strongest part of the ego.

You don’t choose the timing. It’s in your DNA, part of your organism too. Think of it as a clock in the area of ​​your brain that consists of a group of nerves in your hypothalamus, just above the pituitary gland. It is called a circadian pacemaker, or, more commonly, a biological clock. And this watch is the leader of the gang, since each of us has many other smaller ones inside. Which regulate our energy and metabolism, body temperature and blood pressure, creativity and sociability, and a whole lot more.

We are not all the same

Our ancestors wisely followed their biorhythm. Well, between us, they didn’t have much choice. They hunted for food, ate and went about their business from sunrise to sunset. And then rest. Anyway, there was no light beyond that of the fire.

And then came civilization, progress, and this in turn led to modern societies. Most of our time is no longer spent in nature, but indoors. And we don’t need to fit them all into the hours when there is light, we also have the artificial one. And computers, tablets, smartphones and it doesn’t fit. And with them FOMO, the fear of something happening and us missing out. And may our working hours expand and may the evening shrink.

So here is the good disruption of the biological clock. Sometimes we wanted to fit in, sometimes there was no other socially acceptable solution, the result is the same. We have created a single rhythm of everyday life, in one size for all. However, there is no one-size-fits-all biological clock, and this also applies to your sleep, your food, your work and sex.

Bad time-alignment is what scientists call what we have suffered and bears the responsibility for the diseases of civilization, as they call them. Obesity, diabetes, malignancies, heart disease, mood disorders. As a result, sleep disorders, anxiety, depression, mental and physical exhaustion.

Time for sex

According to Breus, 72% of sexual intercourse occurs at a time that is somehow “convenient”. That is, when the day’s work is over, the two partners are available and in bed at the same time. Oh, how romantic, huh? And yet. Most people say they have sex between 10 and 11:30 at night.

About a convenient time. But about the hour of desire? Testosterone is highest in the morning hours and if we take advantage of our hormone party, we will start the new day with more oxytocin and less stress. While after the afternoon there is a decrease in testosterone, progesterone, estrogen, adrenaline and cortisol, and melatonin increases. Generally, our body prepares to go into sleep mode.

Of course, early morning sex is often not possible. To help the scientists, they put them down and looked for them. And the chronotype was found. Considering all of our sleep and wake habits, heredity and personality, each of us has our own chronotype. This formula defines, among other things, the preferred times of each of us for all our activities and physical needs, and of course the best time for each of us to have sex.

Bears, lions, wolves and dolphins

You will have met people who claim to be anything but morning types, you will have met others who by the time you wake up, they have already done half of the day’s work. Based on the characteristics of each, we are divided into four chronotype categories.

  • Chronotype bear

50-55% of people belong here. They are attentive, outgoing, friendly and open-minded. They are not friends with conflicts and feel calm when their surroundings are familiar. Their priority is health and happiness.

The bear sleeps relatively soundly, but feels that this is never enough for her. From the moment he wakes up, it takes a couple of hours to tell that he’s taken it easy. Thus, she is alert from mid-morning to early afternoon, showing her maximum productivity before noon. Then it gets heavy. On the weekends he tries to sleep more to get enough, but on Sundays he is awake so starting the week is always a difficult task. If you look like a bear, the ideal time for you to have sex is at 7 in the morning, but also at 9 at night.

  • Chronotype lion

15% of people belong here. They are conscientious, stable, practical and optimistic. They place special emphasis on their health and good physical condition. They usually achieve more than expected, exceeding expectations.

The lion wakes up early in the morning and in the early hours is extremely productive and active. He rushes into everything, accomplishes everything and faces every challenge or problem head on. Therefore, his energy is depleted during the day and so after the afternoon he is in a sleepy state. If you see similarities here, the ideal time for you to have sex is between 6 and 7 in the morning – good luck at this point, you’ll probably need it to find a partner that suits you.

  • Chronotype wolf

15-20% of people belong here. They are creative and impulsive, pessimistic and moody. They prioritize their pleasure and react to any tensions with more intensity. They take risks and like innovations.

The wolf loves to snooze on the alarm clock. He’s usually late for work and it takes at least three coffees before you can tell he’s actually awake. He gets angry when those around him don’t understand his need to sleep in the morning and consider him lazy. Besides, that’s not all. It’s just that his hours are kind of disruptive. After 7 pm he is alert and late at night proves to be extremely productive. If you are having sex, the ideal time for you to have sex is at 10 in the morning, or even better at 10:30 at night.

  • Dolphin Chronotype

10% of the population belongs here. They are intelligent and cautious, introverted and neurotic. They strive for perfection and pay attention to detail while trying to avoid dangerous situations.

Just as the dolphin in the sea sleeps with only half of his brain so that with the other half he perceives possible dangers around him, so the man-dolphin is a light sleeper. He is prone to anxiety and has insomnia. When he manages to sleep, he wakes up during the night to think about the mistakes he made. Thanks to his sleep disturbances, the dolphin wakes up tired and stays in this state until late at night. He is productive in small scattered intervals during the day, whenever he manages to gather his energy. If this all sounds familiar, your ideal time for sex is 8pm.

You have your time zone, add that your partner may have a different time zone than you, he also added the modern day-to-day programs, the window seems small. Well, don’t take it that way. Just adjust your expectations so that you don’t get discouraged and unnecessarily think that the passion went for a walk. Don’t bring disaster, maybe it’s just not your time.