When you meet a small child, even if it is not yours, the “whys” you will hear are dozens. “Because the sky is blue”, “why does not make me eat a second sweet”, “because your shoes are bigger than mine” and many more.
And in the beginning you have to admit that it is tempting to answer all these questions. But after the 17th “why”, you somehow start to despair.
So, what is the right way to answer this question? And why does an infant enjoy asking it over and over again?
Allison Tsomos, a teacher who became vice president at Celebree School, analyzes all the details for you.
First, why is “why” such a common question for children and infants? Tsomos explains that the question “why” is actually a direct answer to the rapid development of the left hemisphere of their brain between 18 and 30 months. This is the part that is responsible for logical thinking skills such as math, reading and writing. It is also a developmentally appropriate question related to their interest in better understanding their world. “Scientifically speaking, they develop synaptic connections with the brain, which will reach 1,000 trillion by the age of three,” explains Tsomos.
In other words, they are expanding their knowledge and building problem-solving intelligence.
But what is the best way to answer?
If the child is three or older, you can reverse the question and ask: “I do not know, what do you think?”. “This question requires a child to use the data already stored and come up with a logical answer,” says Tsomos. “By the age of three, they usually have enough data stored and a child has repetitive experiences to respond to.”
But what if he can not answer that? Before answering a child’s question with a question, ask yourself: “Based on his life experiences so far, has he collected enough data to make a guess?” If the answer is yes, ask, “What do you think?” But if the answer is no, give him as much information as you can.
Here is an example from Tsomos: If you tell your child to put on his winter coat, he probably has enough experience to know why (“it will keep me warm”), but if you tell them, “it will probably rain today” and say, “why?”, there is a good chance he has not gathered enough data for the weather to understand that the rain is coming. “In this scenario, you have to give him the data and knowledge that he can store for future use,” Tsomos explains.
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