I needed to check if it was true.
They posted on Twitter a photo of a packet of snacks –Doritos, 300 g, R$21.99– being sold at the supermarket in two interest-free installments of R$11.
It’s already a bit absurd to charge 22 dicks in 300 grams of transgenic corn with radioactive sodium powder, but splitting it up seems too surreal.
I activated my investigative journalist mode to kill the charade. I went to Google, which is said to be a very popular site, and typed in “doritos”. In the “shopping” tab, there it was, the snack in installments.
Behold, the great promotion is also available on the internet. And even better: on the Clube Extra website, the 300-gram doritos can be split up to FOUR TIMES. Four soft installments of R$ 5.70, totaling R$ 22.80 (yes, more expensive: if you want to extend the payment, take embedded interest!).
We’ve already traded steak for chicken, chicken for egg, egg for bone. We’ve already had chicken foot inflation, given the demand from families without money to buy other food.
Now we have the snack in the installment plan and not only that. This week, on the refrigerated counter of a supermarket, chicken skin trays sold at R$ 2.99 a kilo.
Chicken skin is delicious fried, and its melted lard – the schmaltz – is a staple of Eastern European Jewish cuisine. However, its offer is unprecedented in Brazilian commerce, and there is no evidence that it is the result of the sudden multiplication of Jewish mothers.
Finally, the most astounding news of the week, which does not have the involuntary black humor of the other two: in São Paulo, the value of the basic food basket reached R$ 1,226.10, according to a survey by Procon and Dieese. A minimum wage is worth R$ 1,212.
Want to eat in Brasil de Bolsoguedes? Turn around. And then turn around again to afford luxuries like housing, clothing, and transportation.
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