Embila is shocked: “I had fallen into a deep depression, I thought I was going to die”

The French ace of Olympiakos, Ian Embillagave an interview to LIBERATIONrevealing unknown and harsh aspects of his life.

Specifically, the 32-year-old referred to his difficult childhoodas well as in depression who passed in 2016, saying he felt like he was going to die.

In detail what he said:

On whether to make a mid-season ski trip: “No I don’t ski (smiles). I have 4 kids so…”

For his football and not only background: “Yes there was a time when I did things differently: parties, friends and taking a plane to go anywhere. Not now. Look I had 2 kids when I was 20 and by that time I had become an international. Then you grow up and see things differently. Today when I can do something I do it with my children and my family. And of course my mother.”

For his mother: “I always knew that no matter what happened he would always be there for me.”

For 2010-2012 when all doors had opened for him: “Ten months after my first match with Rennes I was in the 30 for the World Cup. Ten months! No one makes such a leap. It was all too fast for me. I should have been more focused and focused and protected myself better. I was 20 years old and a private jet, a jet just for me for the needs of the sponsor took me from France and took me to Barcelona for a photo shoot and it had to be like normal for me. I felt then that I was simply living the life of any player. And I didn’t mind.”

On his meeting with Mbappe’s mother: “I met his mother in Rennes, who was there for Ekoko (Ebape’s half-brother). Awesome lady and very strong personality. I never forget how I spent my life in France. Cousteron’s sandwiches and so much more. How we used to go to my grandparents’ house and when we went to my mother’s we had a 10 franc coin to buy Coca Cola Freeway at Lidl. Even today we do the same with my kids with sandwiches and Coca Cola. I still buy my baguette from Lidl in my area in France because that’s what I prefer. When I was 14 or 15, Ren gave me 292 euros a month. And then my father would take it all. And because he got the money on the 6th of the month, I went to the ATM on the 5th to get the money and have him withdraw it for us.”

On his childhood difficulties: “One Friday the police came to take me from school to take me to a place for abused women, where my mother had been taken. I remember turning on the TV and hearing that hitting your children is wrong. My father was a cruel man. I was 6 and he said ‘you have to run for an hour’ and I had to do it. At the age of 14 in Rennes I could meet the toughest physical tests. Then for me football was not a hobby. I had a goal. I got my mother’s mind and character. Without them I wouldn’t be here. And although my father was very hard and difficult and without him I wouldn’t be here. I love my father and I have forgiven him.”

On the problems in his career:“When I returned to Kazan in 2016 the management gave me the biggest contract I ever had (according to the information at the time it was 6 million plus bonuses). Money doesn’t buy happiness. I say this because I know: at the time I was deeply depressed. I had panic attacks. I felt lonely and had a problem with distance. I was afraid I would lose everything. I was waking up and shaking. I thought I was going to die. I even looked it up on the Internet, how can you die like that.”