How to deal with anxiety at the end of the year? expert gives tips

“So it’s Christmas, and what did you do? The year ends and it’s born again.” As soon as Simone’s music starts playing on the radios in early December, anxiety takes over Feldenkrais educator Marianna Muradas, 34. She says she can’t stand this madness at the end of the year because people go into an automatic mode. “There is an obligation to consume, to see each other and, many times, due to social pressure, because you don’t always want to be together or be able to buy that. And that is not the real purpose of Christmas”, she says.

She says she started to hate the date when she was about eight years old and was at the old Mappin store shopping with her mother. “I had a Santa Claus ornament in the checkout line to pay when a woman grabbed the ornament from my hand. It was extreme violence, rudeness. There I saw what a person is capable of doing because of the social pressure of Christmas which brings attitudes totally misaligned with the true Christmas spirit”, he commented.

Muradas worked for years in shopping malls and increasingly saw the rampant consumption that generates so much anxiety. “You see the person feeling bad because they don’t have conditions to give someone a present, unconsciously they blame themselves because they didn’t produce enough to be calm at that time”, she observes. “I spent many Christmases alone. Now with my son we celebrate with his grandparents, but he knows that Santa Claus is a fantasy and we are the ones who buy presents”, says Tom’s mother, 4.

Already the New Year she loves to celebrate. “The feeling I have is that this anxiety goes on until the 24th. Then it goes to a place of relaxation, what you did, you did, what you realized. The year will turn around, start over and there is no longer that chaotic hallucination of Christmas” , says Muradas, who likes the rituals involving New Year’s Eve.

Psychologist Daniela Andretto explains that the end of the year, as the name implies, is for closure. “The year is coming to an end, when there is a closing deadline and it brings to the person that feeling of will I be able to finish/do everything I wanted? Besides the euphoria for commercial reasons, if the person hasn’t seen their friends, they will want to see , if he didn’t find it, he wants to find it. As if he had to complete what was not achieved during the year”, he observes.

Andretto says that many are left with that feeling of mourning for not having achieved something. “It’s important to get away from that natural pressure because of the date. If you have some goals that you didn’t achieve, keep them for next year and don’t get attached to the issue of the closure itself. If it didn’t happen now, it could be in a few days. It is important not to get carried away by these dates”, he guides.

She notes that this social pressure makes everyone want to tackle everything at the same time. “This generates a change in behavior, people are more frustrated because of the urgency of solving problems and this even interferes with our relationships. So, take care of yourself and the people around you”.

The psychologist says that the end of the year can be less stressful if you understand that your process is bigger than any date. “Changing my behavior in life, my relationship, my work, you don’t have to wait for it to be at the beginning or at the end of the year. If you have a wish that hasn’t been fulfilled yet, if it’s important to you, keep it as much as possible, it’s not the date that determines whether you’ve made it or not, but your attitude,” he observes.

Specializing in assisting women and mothers, the psychologist says that many are more exhausted, especially when the division of tasks and obligations is not equal. “Many times it is necessary to make new agreements to avoid this overload of activities, as there is a gift from the school teacher, the mother-in-law, the children in the family. There are new demands that arise at Christmas and it is necessary to look at these small new tasks and divide them up. them not to get out of control financially and mentally,” he says.

How to start 2023 right?

The psychologist says that the turn of the year also brings more optimism and hope to achieve new achievements, to be a better year. “The most important thing is to respect yourself. Take this as an incentive and remember that you don’t have to be different than you are, nor set yourself long goals. Be honest with yourself and reflect on where you respected yourself in this year that ends. what did you good or bad in this year that is ending? And start thinking about what you need to have the courage to abandon to be a lighter year”, he says.

Andretto explains that the ideal is not to set collection goals for 2023, but challenges.

“Turn the goal into a challenge. The challenge gives you pleasure to conquer, because the way the brain will face the task is different than if it were a goal. Treating this challenge as something positive will make the difference so that you can achieve it. it,” he says.